If you died tonight, would your friends be the type to make dua for you all night as you endure the hardships of the grave? Or would they forget about you?
Are the people you call your “closest friends” helping you build your akhirah or are they only helping you get pleasures from this dunya?
Are they the type of people to remind you to pray, stay away from haram, and remember Allah (SWT)? Are you the kind of friend that helps someone else become a better Muslim?
Would you feel confident standing beside your friends on the Day of Judgment? Or would you look at them and feel a sense of regret?
The Best Role Model in Friendships: Prophet Muhammad (SAW)
Friendships are one of the most sacred things in a person’s life, and choosing the most righteous ones is important not only for this world because we are recognized by those surrounding us, but also for the eternal world because they become a support system who will pray that our souls reach the highest level in Jannah. Indeed, friendships are blessings and they are tests. We have those who are beside us to support us even before a single teardrop can fall. There are others who have hurt us in such a way that we spend nights on the musallah bearing our hurt to our Lord. As youth, friendships offer you the greatest lessons on how to treat people, and they allow you to discover more about yourself (how you like being treated, what characteristics you appreciate, what characteristics you should abstain from, etc).
However, our greatest role model and the best teacher of friendships, Prophet Muhammad (SAW), has truly set the standard on which types of friendships bring a mo’min closer to Allah (SWT). For example, let us look at the beautiful bond of brotherhood and friendship between the Prophet (SAW) and Ali ibn Abu Talib (RA).
The Night of Loyalty
Imagine the scene. It was the darkest hour of the night in Makkah. The streets were silent, but a deadly plan was in motion. Outside of the home of the Prophet (SAW), young men from the Quraysh tribes stood waiting, armed & ready to assassinate the Messenger (SAW) at dawn. They were desperate. The message of tawheed was spreading too quickly, and they had made a plan to end the life of the Prophet (SAW) before he (SAW) could escape to Madinah. Yet, inside the house, another plan was unfolding simultaneously, and this one was crafted by divine wisdom. While outside there was eagerness, inside the Prophet’s (SAW) home, there was peace and tranquility. He (SAW) turned to his beloved cousin and, with a calm but serious voice, said something that would forever define their bond, “O Ali, tonight I need you to sleep in my bed.”
Ali ibn Abu Talib (RA), known for his bravery and devotion, agreed without hesitation. His act was not just one of courage, but of deep love, reverence, friendship, and loyalty to the Prophet (SAW). By Allah’s (SWT) mercy, the Prophet (SAW) departed safely and, when the Quraysh stormed the house, they found Ali ibn Abu Talib (RA) instead. By Allah’s (SWT) will, he, too, survived their attack.
Further proof of his exemplary and honorable friendship, Ali ibn Abu Talib (RA) remained in Makkah briefly after this incident to return entrusted belongings before joining the Prophet (SAW) in Madinah. The Prophet (SAW) was known as Al-Amin (the Trustworthy), and Ali ibn Abu Talib (RA) was adamant upon ensuring his reputation remained intact.
Can you think of a more perfect example of what a real friendship for the sake of Allah (SWT) looks like? We should all be so lucky.
Not every friend is good for you, even if they’re fun to be around
Sometimes, we confuse fun with friendship. It’s easy to chill with someone who makes you laugh, who gets your sense of humor, who’s “low drama.” But what happens when it’s time to stand up for something? When you’re tempted to fall into sin, to skip prayers, to cross a line with your behavior. Who’s beside you then? Who’s there to prevent you from falling down a deep hole, and to instead rise and become the best version of yourself?
When Friends Become Enemies on the Day of Judgment
There’s a reason Allah (SWT) gives us a harsh and clear warning in Surah Az-Zuhruf, “Close friends will be enemies to one another on that Day, except the righteous […].” (The Clear Quran®, 43:67)
In other words, the people you laughed with, posted selfies with, and made plans with, they may stand against you on the Day of Judgement. Unless you helped each other fear Allah (SWT). Unless your love was based on truth, and not fleeting trends or “good times”.
What makes a friend righteous in Islam?
- They remind you of Allah (SWT) gently. They are not really the ones who aggressively send you lectures of what scholars have to say about a particular issue you’re struggling with whilst simultaneously judging you, but they approach you with compassion and sincerity. They might say, “Let’s pray Asr together before we forget,” or they might send you verses from The Quran or ahadith throughout the day to show you that they’re thinking of you. This is the type of reminder Allah (SWT) praises in The Quran when He said in Surah Adh-Dhariyat, “But continue to remind. For certainly reminders benefit the believers.” (The Clear Quran®, 51:55)
- They also love you for the sake of Allah (SWT). It’s not love based on looks, vibes, or convenience, but on a shared goal of pleasing Allah (SWT). The Prophet (SAW) has said, “Whoever loves for Allah, hates for Allah, gives for Allah, and withholds for Allah—has completed their faith.” (Sunan Abi Dawud)
- They are honest with you, even when it is hard. They don’t just hype you up when you’re wrong. They remind you of the truth kindly because they care about your akhirah more than your ego.
- They’re with you, always in the dunya, and want to see you in Jannah. Some companions would literally say to the Prophet (SAW), “We’re afraid we won’t be with you in Jannah!” That’s the level of love and companionship they had. A righteous friend doesn’t want to just see you succeed here, they want to see you succeeding your way into Jannat ul Firdaws.
- They always make dua for you in your absence. A sincere friend doesn’t just talk to you, they talk to Allah (SWT) about you. Even when you’re not around, they’re asking Allah (SWT) to guide you, protect you, forgive you, and bless you. That’s love based on imaan. The Prophet (SAW) said, “The dua of a Muslim for his brother in his absence is responded to. At his head is an angel appointed, and every time he makes dua for good for his brother, the angel says, “‘Ameen, and for you the same!’”
Always be the friend you wish you had
Let’s not only search for these qualities in others all the time, but let’s also strive to be that person. Maybe your group needs someone to take the first step, so why not become that person?
- Be the one who prays on time so others are reminded too.
- Share a dua or a reminder without preaching.
- Refuse to join in gossip, and politely redirect the conversation.
- When your friend is struggling in faith, remind them that Allah (SWT) is always near.
You never know, your courage and sincere friendship for His (SWT) sake could save someone’s imaan.
A friendship worth praying for
If you’ve been feeling isolated in your effort to practice Islam, or if you’ve had to distance yourself from a toxic friend group, know that Allah (SWT) sees your struggle. Replacing old friendships with righteous ones can feel lonely at first, but trust that the reward is near.
The Prophet (SAW) promised, “Allah will say on the Day of Judgment: Where are those who loved each other for My sake? I will shade them in My shade, on a day when there is no shade but Mine.” (Sahih Muslim, 2566)
That shade is real. And the friendships that earn it? They start with small choices, like choosing the company that brings you closer to Allah (SWT).
Every day when you rise to begin writing a new page of your life story, begin with this dua: “Oh Allah (SWT)! Bless me with friends who guide me to You. Make me a friend who lifts others with sincerity, patience, and truth. Unite us in Your love, and reunite us in Jannah.” Ameen!
